I've Been Told I Have Nymphomaniac Disorder

Fri, 02/13/2015 - 09:01
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr. Betty,

hello, I'm a 19 year old female from England and recently I've been told I have the nymphomaniac disorder and it does make me feel like im going crazy because sex is on my mind every second of everyday.

I want it everyday I been referred by my dr to talk to some people but the only problem it feels like it doesn't matter who I sleep with (but I only have sex with people I know not strangers) theres a ex boss of mine and he's a married man and I've recently got back in contact with him after 4 years and he kissed me and since then it went from kissing to sex the only thing is I do want to stop because hes married but the sex Is to good what do I do? feels like my disorder is taking over my life can u help?

Dear D,

If your definition of sex is limited to fucking some dude, then yes, it can become a problem especially when you pick the wrong ones. How about taking the edge of your desire for sex by spending some time masturbating? Giving yourself regular care-free safe happy orgasms? Also take up a physical activity to burn off some of your"nervous" energy.

It also sounds like you could use a good therapist to help sort out your current sexual behavior. Also please drop the label "nymphomaniac" which means a woman who is having more sex than her doctor. Labels can be very destructive and seldom helpful, so please ignore this one. I repeat: Masturbate and discover your sexual self.

Dr. Betty

Liberating women one orgasm at a time

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.

nymphomania/hypersexuality

Fri, 02/13/2015 - 09:46
NorthLondonHousewife

I wondered whether this post was genuine - being diagnosed with nymphomania sounds so very Victorian.

The writer seems to be describing hypersexuality, associated with borderline personality disorder (BPD). Hypersexuality describes an extreme concern with sex, amount of sex or an addiction to sex, Ofcourse there is an argument that all human behaviour has a spectrum and someone has to be an outlier at the extreme edge.

Nonetheless, diagnosis seems to be made where the person involved feels out of control or uncomfortable with their sex life. There are lots of possible causes for hypersexuality, physical and psychological, such as drug abuse, dementia, Pick's Disease, bipolar conditions, OCD as applied to partnersex or masturbation and various other types of mental and neurological disorders.

Her doctor seems to have referred her to a psychotherapist which sounds sensible if s/he believes there's a psychological cause.

In the UK you're unlikely to get a referral to a therapist unless there's a genuine medical problem. It's unlikely to have been a moral judgement on the part of the doctor, because it comes out of his patient budget at some level.

Let's hope D gets the help she needs.

Nymphomania nonsense

Fri, 02/13/2015 - 13:21
Patrick_R

'Nymphomania' seems to have been coined during an era when a woman who actively sought sexual pleasure was assumed to have an illness that overwhelmed her natural female modesty and aversion to sex. Today it might be called sex 'addiction', a term that originally meant a condition of actual chemical dependency. Today, 'addiction' is commonly used to describe any compulsive behavior that continues despite negative consequences to one's career, relationships, and life in general.

In my health care work, 'hypersexual' was typically (and somewhat informally) used to describe a person who was excessively flirtatious or seductive, which is not uncommon in bipolar disorder and may appear, as NLH notes, in other condlitions as well. I agree with Dr Betty about dropping labels like 'nymphomania', which are always stigmatizing given our culture's ambivalence about sex. Psychotherapy seems like the best option for helping D to be more comfortable with---and in conscious control of---how she expresses her sexuality and forms relationships.

Strictly speaking, there's no

Sat, 02/14/2015 - 08:49
Jeffrey65802 (not verified)

Strictly speaking, there's no such thing as nyphomania, rather what a psychiatrist is gonna write down is obsessive/compulsive disorder. As Dr. Dodson suggested, and I as well would, masturbate each day. Starting our days with some self-pleasure and orgasmic relief so we can focus on other things is an excellent thing to do regardless of what other issues people may have. It also gives a great reason to get out of bed on chillier mornings. ;) I myself would thinking about sex continuously too if not for understanding my own personal needs and taking care of them myself.

Bear in mind that psychiatrists don't make much money unless they proscribe a drug. In the UK it's quite different than in the US as I understand it, but in principle this is sound heh. So before resigning yourself to having some psychiatric condition, try natural solutions first as with masturbating regularly as you need.

Also worth mentioning that especially in the case of women, the assesment a woman likes sex too much is more often going to be male sexism and repression of female sexuality and enjoyment of sex. If everyone were encouraged to like sex, and have sex with other people, they'd be less fearful of other people and all the wars going on would be resisted domestically. Whereas, people conditioned to reject sexual pleasure will be more fearful of others and give their governments authorization to pursue war "to keep them safe." Until we reverse this trend and value sexuality as we do war now, sex is always going to be discouraged.

Doubts

Sat, 02/14/2015 - 13:14
NorthLondonHousewife

Jeffrey,
I have some doubts as to the validity of the post but assuming it's true and based in the UK, then a referral to a therapist suggests there's a real problem to be addressed.

She seems to have been referred to therapist to talk through her issues rather than to medicalise them. In terms of mental illness, talking therapies have been shown to often have better outcomes than drugs but are obviously more expensive.

Since the doctor will have a set budget per patient, they're not set up to profit or persuade her into more expensive choices. If they're referring her to therapists, it will cost the GP's practice more.

It suggests there is a real problem to be addressed though it might be more to do with an excessive worry or obsession about sex rather than the amount of sex she enjoys.Though the amount of sex isn't mentioned (just an excessive worry) as we've all pointed out it's so very subjective - how much is too much, surely someone will be an outlier?

I honestly can't imagine anything shocking or surprising my doctor but neither can I imagine her or any of the doctors/nurses I'm friendly with using the word "nymphomania".

Normal and healthy

Tue, 02/17/2015 - 14:56
Martha (not verified)

D,

What you feel is perfectly normal, natural, and healthy these days.

[= 29.4458503723145px]Society has slowly come out of the shadows of a backward, Elizabethan era that denounced any sex at all. A misinformed, fluke of the long history of human sexuality.[/]

[= 29.4458503723145px][/][= 21.3976287841797px]What used to be branded nympho or extreme is now common, normal for the average healthy woman. [/]

But your sexual joy should not come at the expense of your liberty and control over your orgasm. You can enjoy sex all you like but do not fall into a dependent relationship with a man for that important need.

Sex from a relationship should be like the optional cherry ontop of your icecream. Learn to satisfy yourself and make that your time, your love. Keep yourself satisfied  with your own orgasms, experiment, nurture, increase them.

Only then will you be ready to enter into a relationship on equal terms, on your terms.

Martha

Hi Folks found this on,

Wed, 02/18/2015 - 09:38
NOWHARD

Hi Folks found this on, Wikipedai

Betty says about not putting labels on people NLH has put 3 or 4 on her, but nymphomania as far as I remember from my sexual youth was a person who could not get sexual satisfaction, no matter how many times they had sex in one day, or multi times they have it.

I think what we have here is just a horny young lady and loves her sex life, and what’s below really covers her problems just hope this is not putting labels on her.

Remember us guys do the same, we don’t get sent off for therapy like they wont to send her off, sounds more like a women with a mans sexual brain, or do you think they should not have that?


Persistent genital arousal disorder (PGAD), originally called persistent sexual arousal syndrome (PSAS), Weiss Disease, and also known as restless genital syndrome (ReGS or RGS), results in a spontaneous, persistent, and uncontrollable genital arousal, with or without orgasm or genital engorgement, unrelated to any feelings of sexual desire. It was first documented by Dr. Sandra Leiblum in 2001, only recently characterized as a distinct syndrome in medical literature with a comparable counterpart increasingly reported by men.

Some physicians use the term persistent sexual arousal syndrome to refer to the condition in women; others consider the syndrome of priapism in men to be the same disorder. Priapism is a recognized diagnosable medical condition by the Diagnostic and Stratistical Manual of Mental Disorders IV, whereas PGAD is not. The disorder has been newly included in DSM-5, which was released in May 2013.

In particular, it is not related to hypersexuality, sometimes known as nymphomania or satyriasis. (Hypersexuality, nymphomania, and satyriasis are also not recognized diagnosable medical conditions by the DSM-IV.

Now this piece above from wikipedia I think covers her problem a lot better.

Good Luck

NOWHARD

Apologies

Wed, 02/18/2015 - 14:18
NorthLondonHousewife

D & NOWHARD,

I'm really sorry if my posts came across as labelling - that wasn't deliberate other than to question the use of the word "nymphomaniac". It seems such a very archaic word to find in a reported conversation with a doctor in this day and age.

In the UK referrals to therapists are difficult to come by because the NHS is free at the point of usage. Doctors have a financial disincentive to overprescribe medicine and even more so for therapy. A referral for expensive talking therapy almost certainly means the doctor believes there is a serious issue of some sort. So I'm a bit wary of comments in this thread suggesting D shouldn't attend therapy against the advice of her doctor.

We have no idea what's really going on, only that a medically qualified doctor thinks she needs therapy to help her with whatever problem has been identified, a doctor who effectively loses money by making this decision so has almost certainly thought hard before making the referral.

We have no idea how much partnersex D enjoys, if any,on a regular basis just that it occupies a huge amount of her time worrying about it and that she's entered into a sexual relationship of some sort with her ex-boss. It's entirely plausible that the therapy is to help D accept her current level of activity as healthy. Wouldn't that be great?

Nympho rulez

Sat, 07/25/2015 - 17:09
H. (not verified)

Well, I think that it's OK to be a Nympho, I think I am one, every man I've been with couldn't keep up with me and that made me aware that monogamy is not my thing. I have an issue with those who want to erase the nympho identity, just like what they did with Asexual people before. Sleeping with people you don't know that much is not a "bad" thing (depends if you're religious or not, I guess). However, in this patriarchal society, sleeping with strangers has consequences and you should be careful because you have a lot of possessive dudes out there. I'm still trying to figure out how to control my urges that even hours of masturbation could not satisfy, but I must admit, masturbation helps you become stronger and own your body and sexuality. 
Love
H.

That's a strange tip. I don't

Tue, 01/17/2017 - 01:38
TinaBlackwood (not verified)

That's a strange tip. I don't believe the problem can be solved this. This piece of advice could be givenby some teenager but not a doctor. I believe the problem is much graver and you should consult a real doctor.
essay writers solutions