My Clitoris Hurts

Wed, 08/13/2008 - 14:16
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Betty Dodson.

Yesterday night I saw a Television show called Shock Doc: Masturbation for Girls. I hope you will be able to help me and my boyfriend. My current age is 20 and I live in the Netherlands and I have an huge problem. Every time I have sex with my boyfriend (during clitoral stimulation) or if I masturbate myself my clitoris starts hurting after several minutes (sometimes after 2 sometimes after 10 minutes). I have had this problem my entire life.

We tried a lot already, both direct and indirect stimulation, I tried using a vibrator and I have no problem getting wet. I have got this problem when I am alone. With my previous partners and with my current partner with whom I have a relationship for 3.5 years now. I really enjoy the sex and I am really at comfort when I am with my boyfriend but after a while this pain occurs and the sex stops. Because of this I have never had an orgasm in my life, my boyfriend is understanding. He tries to help me in a lot of ways but it feels so useless. Do you have any idea what this could be? Is it common? Is it some kind of malfunction or just something Mental? I hope you can help me out, I would be really thankful.

Yours sincerely,

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Dear EJ,

Perhaps it's just as simple as using some kind of massage oil on your fingers before touching you clitoris. It has some 8,000 nerve endings and dry or rough fingers do not feel good rubbing on the delicate glans. Also be aware of the amount of pressure you use when rubbing your clit. If you are using condoms and water based lube, check out the ingredients. You might be allergic to latex or some of the ingredients in water based lubes that have a lot of chemicals and dry out after a while. Instead of applying more lube, you just need to add a little water or saliva to thin it out again. All clits are sensitive but feeling pain is not common unless it's due to dryness or excessive pressure. I doubt it's just mental. More likely it's about how you and your boyfriend are handling your clitoris. If this continues, see your health care provider to discover what might be causing this.


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always painful clit

Sun, 06/08/2014 - 01:18
Cy (not verified)

  I am 31 now.  When I was younger, my clit was excessively sensitive, any touch without the benefit of the clitoral hood protecting it was devastatingly painful.  Once, it even hurt when a partner rolled their tongue into a straw shape and blew on it.  Wrestling with partners to keep them from touching it was a constant frustration.  After my second child was born, I attempted to force desensitization by squeezing it very hard several times a day for as long as I could handle.  My clit is still slightly too tender at times, but it is much better than it used to be.