I Don't Feel Sexual Attraction When I See People

Tue, 11/28/2017 - 08:14
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Betty,

I'm 26-year-old, and English is not my mother tongue, so forgive me for any mistakes in writing

I am writing you because I have a problem that I don't know how to identify and I don't know how to solve.

Puzzle's pieces (it took me one hour to finish this!)

1) I don't feel "sexual attraction" when I see people - men or women - I don't find them sexually attractive, some people are aesthetically more (physically or mentally) beautiful than others, and I'm able to fell in love (once in 1'000 years), with "butterflies in my stomach" and so on, but it's all here. No "sexual attraction". No desire. Nothing.

Am I Asexual?

Thu, 03/16/2017 - 08:50
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Dr. Betty,

I don't know whether I'm asexual or what's up with me. I'm a 24 year old girl. I can watch porn, get turned on and rub my clit until I orgasm, but whenever I've tried sexual things with someone else I just don't get turned on, if anything their bodily fluids (cum, saliva) disgust me and no amount of foreplay can get me wet

I fantasise about doing stuff with guys (and sometimes girls) and find them aesthetically pleasing to look at in images, but the real life thing doesn't do anything for me

What's up with me?

Thank you


Dear J,

If you are OK without a sex partner then stay single As long as you are masturbating and enjoying orgasms you are not considered asexual. Instead you are a selfsexual which is a valid lifestyle. Enjoy!

Am I Asexual?

Wed, 06/13/2012 - 09:37
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr. Betty,

I'm 18.5 years old and I've never fallen in love. Moreover, I have never met a person who turned me on.

I have a boyfriend at the moment; he's one year older than me. I'm his first girlfriend and the first girl he's ever kissed, and he's my first experience of a romantic relationship as well. He's very sweet and kind to me, and he doesn't push me to do things I don't want to do. He's not bad looking either.

But despite all the above, I'm not sexually attracted to him. I don't enjoy our kisses because I'm repelled by the saliva, and try to avoid these as much as I can.

How Do We Support Asexual People?

Sat, 04/14/2012 - 17:13
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Betty,

as much as sex has a big part in my life (in theory and practice), i understand that there are people who have little or no interest in sex. mostly those people are pressured that they have any psychological or physical problem and they should take care of it. their way of desire or even non-desire are pathologized.

I'm not Asexual but.....

Sat, 04/03/2010 - 08:00
Submitted by TheBelizean

After years of being tortured for not being pretty and too fat I've come believe those things. I'm 18 years old and I've never had a boyfriend or girlfriend. I've never even kissed anyone. I lied to so many of my friends. I was known for being TOO out there and extremely comfortable and proud with my sexuality. I am and if my friends found out this is how I felt towards sex they would be shocked! Since middle school I've gained A LOT of weight so people don't find me physically attractive. I find myself so disgusting, just the thought of someone touching me, looking at me while they're inside of me, or even loving me makes me uncomfortable and sometimes disgusted. Although I think about sex a lot! I masturbate probably 3 to 4 times a week.